How the heart aches for you, the mind searches for any place it may find you again, the body craves to feel you once more, to touch, kiss, and hold you. Tears wash over as a physical manifestation of grief that kisses the face’s pained expression. The lungs look for more oxygen to breathe as the breath was held in hopes you would be found in the moments in between each breathe, in between each thought. The mind rejects the notion of wanting to love so deeply again for fear that the vulnerability will threaten life itself from the grief of a breaking heart.
When the pain's flood gates close for a moment, there is a clarity that every moment in love was worth it beyond all measure. The strength of one’s heart to be stretched, torn, pulled, and pierced aids in seeing one’s own strength to grieve but yet love again, trust life again. To love comes at a cost but the debt of not loving is even greater. The truth is known to the spirit and the wisdom understood by the heart that there are no walls, separation, or distance between us but the pain of you not here doesn’t change in this moment. So, I’ll sit with this season of winter not trying to turn it to spring and let this energy run through. The fierce grief will be used as a measure of love had for you. Thank you for being the mirror to one’s self and offering the clearest reflection of the truth of love. Forever I will celebrate life, I will celebrate you.
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